Designer: Manikka
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Okay it’s the wee hours of the night now, but I figured if I don’t take the time now to pen my thoughts for the year, I don’t think I ever will have the time anyway. So yes, here goes.

This year has been one hectic year, with the many ups and downs starting from the beginning of the year. With all the drama and friendships broken and mended, tested and strengthened, formed and fostered, continued and deepened, I can truly say that jc has been one eventful year for me.

And I guess I’ll go step by step.

I guess in jc, people change and it’s inevitable that we’ll drift apart because we no longer spend as much time with each other, and all of a sudden our priorities and circle of friends change. So I’m quite sad that I’m no longer as close to some people, as I was before during a certain period of my life or something, but I guess the memories are enough to last a lifetime, as clichéd as that might sound. And I’m quite amazed at my ability to laugh at all the silly things we did together last time, as I read through blog archives or old birthday letters I typed/ received. And of course, with the many incidents occurring throughout the year, they would inevitably leave an impact on certain friendships, and with that render them unable to return to what it was before. Friendships that I didn’t think would be able to be salvaged came back, and friendships that I thought could go back to normal couldn’t. I’m really glad for the former, and with regards to the latter, I guess all I want to say is yeah, thank you for the ups and I’ll try to put the downs behind me (: I know nothing’s going to be the same again, and as much as I didn’t want to accept it last time, I’ve come to accept it now. And I guess I just want to say that despite everything else, you were really a good friend, and I really enjoyed talking to you and everything.

And of course, throughout all these ups and downs, I think I would have died if not for my friends. Who would talk to me until the wee hours of the night, listen to me cry and sound like I’m going to die of grief, or seen me cry (though not many), and would say a million nice things to cheer me up and make me feel better. I really don’t know what I would have done without all of you. There are definitely many more people out there who I would like to know, and as much as people say the world is just too big, I’m just glad that I’ve found friends who I know will last a lifetime, and who are the best friends in the world anyone can ask for. Best friends forever isn’t just a clichéd assurance. In fact, it doesn’t even need to be said but we can all feel it deep down inside. And when stuff happens, you know who your true friends are, because they are the ones who will go out of their way to make sure you’re okay, and will do so much just to make you smile again. And you know who matters the most to you when that name comes to mind when something happens and you just need someone to be there for you.

There are too many to name, so I shall just apportion shoutouts to groups of people/ people who are very important to me!

Okay in view of what happened yesterday, family first. I have no idea what we will be like when we grow up, and as we see ugly scenes happening sometimes I think our greatest fears are that we wonder if we’ll all end up like that in future. But pinky promises that we won’t. And I know we’ll keep to that. I know I’ll never say it out and everything, and I have no idea if they’ll ever know, but sometimes I have an uncontrollable urge to hug my dad, for instance, and tell him that I love him. A lot. I don’t even see him much, considering how I’m usually out for the whole day and everything, but yeah I think for whatever little time I spend with him, I love him for it. And I really want to go on a holiday with daddy again. Ahh the conversation last night comes to mind, but it’s too tedious to type everything out, but I guess it’s really sad how we place friends so much above family sometimes, and yet when we realise it, it seems like it’s too late to change anything and we don’t bother. And we were thinking, what if we died tomorrow, and didn’t have a chance to tell all the people we love that we love them so much. So here goes:

Okay, firstly to the cousin who means a hell of a lot to me. Melanie. I have no idea when we stopped having our many silly little quarrels and arguments, and started becoming so close. And we both know that we’re really very lucky people, because it’s not often that cousins actually like talking to each other so much. Come to think of it, you’re my longest sleepover buddy ever, ever since we were like 7/8 haha (: and thank you for being there for me, whenever I need someone, even if it means having to talk on and on with only whispered mutterings from you in the middle of the night. Thank you for being the most wonderful cousin anyone can ask for, and thank god we have each other sometimes.

2A2B. Ah what can I say but this: <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 one for the each of us. I don’t remember how we started out anymore, and how we even arrived at this silly name! And haha we’ve done so many things together already I can’t remember just exactly how many times we’ve gone kbox, how many sleepovers we’ve had, or baking sessions etc, but I will never forget that no matter what I’m doing, just as long as I’m doing with you all, they were the happiest times of my secondary school and jc life. We are all so different in fact, but we were all brought together by our love for kbox and our friendship has remained strong because of our love for each other (: and I think that’s how our friendship has managed to survive the many ups and downs and challenges that jc has brought us. We may not see each other as often altogether anymore, but each time we meet, the same warm fuzziness comes back and I am really glad to have found friends like you all. Jolyn – the one that I’ve known the longest, and the one who understands me best. I know I can always count on you to listen when I have a problem. I will never forget you sitting at mrt stations with me on emo Mondays, or your daily smses idea and everything, and it actually worked (: so thank you so much, my dear friend of 5 years <3 Jiakang – haha I remember pok and I calling you a b**** sometimes haha when you got really annoying, but of course, your sweetness and niceness overrides that by a million times over. Thank you for all your concern and everything and smses and whatever, because they really did (and still do) mean a lot to me. Princess – compared to last year, we’ve spent wayyy less time with each other this year, but nevertheless even if I forget what we smiled over, cried for and argued about, I will never forget that for that whole year we smiled and cried together, and that alone gives us a special bond that will last us a lifetime I think. Bob – I miss you so much! I remember last year how at farewell assembly we cried and told you not to leave, but we also promised that we’ll keep in touch and everything. This year has shown all of us to stay true to that promise, and I think you’re right, these are really timeless friendships <33 because we have proven that distance and time is not a factor, because everytime we meet it feels as wonderful as ever (:

Pok- haha this year I’ve definitely gotten a lot closer to you, and although you may say really annoying things sometimes, your sweet mushiness and all the nice things you do make me forget all the annoying things you say haha! Thank you for being there for me, especially when I’m pmsing in the middle of the night and everything, because I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t talking to me and saying all those stuff over msn. <33 and your “you remind me of all the prerogatives of being female” HAHA <3333333 i will NEVER ever forget it! i can even memorise it!

TOUCHRUGGERS. I never expected to make such good friends in jc, so I count myself really lucky to have found such wonderful friends in you all. DEARESTESTESTESTESTEST Angel haha (:– ahhh I don’t know where to start, but thank you for phone calls, and late nights and hanging around after school and all that you’ve done for me. I remember in your cupcake letter to me, you wrote: “lucky was the day I signed up for touchrug, because it was through it that I met you” and I laughed so hard at its cheesiness then, but you know what? I feel the same way too. Because if not for touch, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to be so close to you, and talk to you so much and everything. I will never forget the day you stayed up with me until like 2am, even though we had a match the next day at 8 at nus haha. <33 so thank you for being such an ANGEL :D Val – haha it’s true, when did we start getting so close I have no idea. But thank you boyfriend, for all your advice and the nice things you say. I think that sms you sent me about “I know it doesn’t sound the same..” was one of the sweetest smses I have received recently, and I never fail to smile when I read it (: and like I don’t know, but I guess friendship’s really amazing sometimes huh (: Karen, shiya, bong – haha I love hanging out with you all too, even though you always suan me haha! But like I really have a lot of fun with you all (: so yeah I’m glad I found you all through touch! Fifi – haha it’s cool how we meet once again, from being relay runners all the way back in sec two (: and I love you a lot dear captain, even though you suan me damn a lot haha because DEEP DOWN INSID E I KNOW YOU LOVE ME HAHAAAAA

I dunno and there’s also people like Carmen <33 haha who I enjoy talking to a lot too because CARMEN YOU ARE DAMN CUTE AND FUNNY and (: thank you for telling me stuff and everything (:, and of course there’s my new good friend from dryrun2 shun HAHAA (: and we can talk and talk quite a lot I’m quite amazed (: I’m quite sure orientation will be fun!

And since I got to meet and catch up with a lot of people this hols, I realise how lucky I am to have so many wonderful friends and how much I miss seeing them. And strangely, being apart from them sort of brought me closer to some of them Sabrina <33 haha zomg 5 years already, and although we’re not as close as before, I think our friendship is still pretty strong (: and haha my most memorable phonecall this year to you I think was the one when I came back from Cambridge haha (: Kelly – KELLY DARLING <33 zomg I miss you quite a bit haha! And I’m really glad we got to go out twice this hols (: I LOVE YOU GIRLFRIEND. Cherylw – haha san gen cao (: and yeah ndp preview was great, and so was our recent outing (: I’m glad guides brought us together, first as chickies (zomg this was AGES ago haha how silly we were last time!) and then san gen cao (: nattay – my favouritest junior of all time <333333333 ahh I’m really glad to have you as my junior my dear girl, and we certainly do quite a lot of memorable things, like going crazy over Felicia chin and Julian hee, and you and your cookies haha and eating at the nice Italian restaurant along the bay (: Rachel – yes, like you wrote in your Christmas card to me, I have no idea how everything suddenly just came together, but anyhow I’m glad it did. And yeah if you need anyone I’ll be here for you (: and yeah strangely how this year we’re actually closer than we have been even though we were classmates for the past four years Xiuqing - HAHA you’re the only one I can say SWORN SISTERS FOREVER to and not think it’s corny, because it’s proven true (: I mean since primary school hello, it’s super cool how when we meet now we can still talk and talk for hours on end! (: Nicole- haha quite cool that I went out with you that day because of our bet, but we had quite a nice chat, and I’m glad we went out. Yeah thanks for sharing and listening all at once (: lina – haven’t been out with you in ages, but yeah FRIEND OF GOD KNOWS HOW MANY YEARS haha! Through silly fights, funny times and everything (: haha thank you for being such a great friend haha I remember the day we had that faithful mrt ride home and we went to bedok interchange because I didn’t feel like going home!

Okay this is really long, but I think I just want to say WHAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT FRIENDS <3 jc has been as hectic and as unpredictable as we all expected it to be, in some areas more unexpected than others, but I’m glad that we’ve proven all those clichés right. “I’ll be there for you, these five words I swear to you”, “best friends forever”, “you can always count on me”, “I’ll stand by you” etc never rang so true. When I was down, you all say the things I want to hear, be it cheesy cheerup lines, or siding with me and bashing up everyone else, or reassurances that I’ll forever have you all, everything meant so much (and of course they still do). I think this year I’ve grown up a lot, as has everyone, inevitably changed and matured as certain incidents forced me to, and learnt a lot.

I have no idea what next year will bring, or if it’ll be spent mostly mugging hard for the As but all in all, times when things hit rockbottom-low aside, this year has been a pretty awesome year, and thank you everyone who made it so awesome for me, even if it’s not a constant thing, and you did for just a short period of time.

and p.s. thank you everyone who messaged me/ asked me if i'm okay and stuff (: yeah i'm really fine, no worries (: